Importance of Non-action

Hi, I’m Fahad and I’m an addict.

I’m addicted to the endorphins that are released into my body after a tough workout. I’m compelled by the story that I can use each day to sculpt and adapt myself physically and mentally to excel at a particular skill such as freediving. I relish the process of extracting lessons from those who are more experienced and figuring out how to implement them into my own routine. It’s an endeavor in which curiosity, creativity, dedication, kinesiology, and equanimity intertwine. It’s a pursuit I’m compelled by for reasons I’m not fully aware of.

Addictions, of course, aren’t particularly good for you. When I use this hunger as fuel it may even work to my advantage, assuming things are going well. However, the downside becomes evident to me when I’m prevented from making physical progress towards my goals. That’s when this addiction comes around to bite me in the ass.

I haven’t been able to do any serious physical training over the past two months due to a recurring injury. It’s been a testing time, that’s led me to question my involvement and aspirations in the sport of freediving. It’s the one thing I want to work towards more than anything else right now, but I can’t. I’m a painter without a brush, a surfer without waves, a seed without soil.

For me, it’s times like these when I question things, such as my experience as an animal on this unusual rock locked in an orbit around an exploding star. I tend towards spending more time alone. I meditate more deeply. I write introspectively to explore my subconscious.

I find myself in this state, only to recall the ancient Chinese philosophy of Wu Wei (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wu_wei), which loosely translates to “non-action”. I think that the reason I find myself feeling so restricted is because there’s a disparity between what my mind wants to do and what my body can do. It may seem like a simple realization, but I was blind to it as a began writing this. It’s why I love writing. It’s a powerful tool for self discovery. A mindset of trying to force one’s will regardless of the surrounding, varying situation is a recipe for disaster, and I’m glad that’s been brought to my attention

Now that I’ve identified the source of my frustration, I can work towards resolving it. I need to work towards cultivating a mental environment with a focus on what is, as opposed to what should be. To relax into the states of resistance, discomfort and conflict we regularly encounter in life. To relax enough to see that there’s not such a stark difference between those states and their opposites (peace, harmony, pleasure). They are experienced for a moment, and then they pass. They are waves at sea.